It's funny how things work...

I have an interview today. I was contacted yesterday. (Thank God for sick days and the ability to leave messages for your bosses before they are even at their desks...I hate lying, but I have to take care of me.)

Things have moved FAST. I applied for the job just before Christmas and heard back the next day that my application materials would be forwarded on to the hiring manager, which is extremely rare for this place. Then the "company" was closed for a holiday break, so I had to wait to see if I would be contacted. I wasn't holding my breath; this place is notorious for dragging out the hiring process. How do I know? I worked for them before, just in another department. Yes, if I am offered the job and accept, I would be going back to the place I worked at years ago. But this job is a MUCH better fit for me, at least from what it looks like on paper.

Yesterday was the second day that the staff was back from break, and what pops up in my Gmail inbox? An email which included this: "Could you come tomorrow at 1 PM? It's the last spot we have available." I actually thought about it...instead of replying RIGHT BACK with a "YES!! YES PLEASE!!!!" Should I say no? Should I see if I can get another appointment?

No, it was time to say yes and take a chance. Do it. Do it for yourself--you know you've been miserable and unappreciated. Do it for Turtle, who knows you can do so much better. Do it for your future family, in whatever shape and form they come in, because this job pays more, is closer to home and the benefits--oh! I don't want to get ahead of myself...

I used to regret leaving the old job at this same place because of the "perks." All of that vacation time, holiday break, great benefits...but I was unhappy with the workload. I tried to transfer, unsuccessfully, to another department that would be a better fit. What I realized a few months ago is that I would have never gotten where I am today if I hadn't left and tried something else. In regards to this place, people say "No one ever leaves THERE." But had I stayed, I would have been pigeon-holed and probably more miserable than I am now.

I'm just so thankful that I'm getting the chance to interview. When I left this place, about 5 years ago, I thought that I could never go back, that I probably had some black mark on my record. (I left on my own will and on my terms, but there were a few instances where I wasn't a good worker, but never formally documented. Just a bored young girl, fresh out of college who didn't get how the real world worked.) Someone sees something interesting about my resume and wants to know more about me. That's pretty cool, no matter WHAT the end result is. I could end up with an offer and say no. They could go with someone else.

I do have other applications out there, but this is the first I've heard back from any of them. I don't want to be the person who jumps at the first offer, but...again, I'm getting ahead of myself. A few months ago, I started praying for a vocation, in the vein of "if I have to be a working mom, please let me find a job that will allow for me to best take care of my family, as the one I'm currently at does/will not. Just show me the way, a path to that." I'm not saying that this is the path, not yet, but we'll see.

With this awesome development comes a bit of sadness. Turtle still feels like his career is stunted, and it probably is...but it's not his fault. His accident, recuperation time, then a layoff really did put him back and did close the door to a few more physical careers. He feels as if he's less of a man, because he can't "provide" in the way that he wants to, and that I'll really be the breadwinner if I was to get this job (or any new job). I tell him it's ridiculous, that we're in this together, but it's hard to help someone see something when they are upset. It didn't help that a girl at his work gave her notice yesterday after getting a job at a place where he'd like to work, and she has much less direct experience than he does. It was experiences from a past job/career that helped her gain an advantage over other candidates. I don't think he would have applied for that job in the first place, it was more of an admin position, where he's more direct service/management, but I think it was just 2 pieces of job-related news in one day. He knows he's lucky to have a job, but it's not where he wants to be. I just keep praying that he'll be comfortable in his current spot and that something more along the lines of what he wants to do will open up. Because it's hard to have something go right for one partner and not the other.